Bruce Sullivan once again provides expert advice on how to help each other after the recent Qld disasters.
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Bruce Sullivan once again provides expert advice on how to help each other after the recent Qld disasters.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: RSS
When individuals hear the term family they generally think about their parents and their siblings. Others will make sure that they include their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins within that mix as well. But, what is very important to remember is that these are not the only individuals that must be included when someone thinks about the word family. What about individuals that do not have any close living relatives? Does that mean that they are without any family? It really depends on how that term is defined. The rest of this article will examine a few common ways of looking at the word family in order to determine who really does make up your family. You may be amazed at just how many family members you really do have.
First, and foremost, it is very important to take the time to consider what your family does for you. Many people will tell you that their family is a support for them. They can rely on the members of their family when they are having a rough time, or they are struggling and need something. So, if you consider this a very important aspect of family you may want to spend some time thinking about the individuals around you that you may turn to for support. How often do you call on them when you need something? Are they really reliable for you? Would you consider this person a member of your family? Maybe this person is really there for you much more than someone in your immediate family. This may mean the world to you.
Next, many people will tell you that they can talk to their family members and tell them all of their problems and concerns. They know that this information will not be shared with others and their privacy will be respected at all costs. Now, do you have any friends that you can talk to in the same manner? Do you tell these individuals more than you tell your own, immediate family members? Would you consider this person a part of your family?
Finally, take some time to think about what you actually do for your family members. Are you there for them when they are struggling? Do you go out of your way in order to help them and keep them safe? Do you listen to their problems and keep the things that they tell you very close to you? Do you have friends that you would do the same things for? These individuals may be closer to you than many of your family members.
It can be very difficult for some individuals to feel like they have a family to turn to if they are an only child, or their loved ones have passed away. However, this article has shown that everyone has a family that will love and support them if they look hard enough. The only thing that really matters is the way that the term family is defined. Therefore, it may only be necessary to change the way that this word is defined in order to identify the members in your family.
With the invention of the internet dating is becoming easier for individuals that are looking for someone to spend their time with. But, just because it is easier does not mean that it is any safer. Actually, it might be very unsafe for people that do not have a few simple tips to dating safely. This article will explore a few of the things that should be done in order to ensure that you are safe when you go on those first few dates. These tips can be used for individuals that meet at the office, as well as those individuals that meet online.
One of the major things to consider is where you meet. This should always be a neutral location. It should also be a location that has a lot of lighting and it should be in a public location. First dates should not take place at the person’s home and the individuals should not meet on a deserted road in order to “ride together” to their destination. These things are not safe and should be avoided.
Another tip is to really think about what you want to tell the person during your first date. If you have never really spoken to the individual before then you will want to make sure that you are not telling him, or her, personal information about yourself. You do not want the person to know exactly where you live, or how much money you make. While it may be tempting to tell this person everything, you will want to avoid a lot of personal information, no matter how nice the person may seem to be. Besides, you want to save some information for the next few dates.
Wait before you leave the date. This may sound odd, but hear me out. You want to let your date get on their way before you leave the location. You do not want him, or her, to be able to follow you back to your home. This might be a really good idea if your date was not that enjoyable, or the person made you feel uncomfortable. Maybe you can let the person know that you have to use the restroom before you leave, or that you need to wait on another friend to meet you. Do whatever you need to do in order to let the other person leave so that you can have a safe trip home.
Many of these things may sound like common sense. However, many individuals do not do them. That is when things can become very dangerous. Now, not every person you meet is going to be bad. But, when you do not know, it is always best to play it safe.
As the deadline of Christmas is fast approaching, it’s easy to let exhaustion turn into cynicism.
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The decision to get a divorce is one of the most heart-wrenching and difficult choices a person will probably ever have to make in their life. It is a time that is often characterized by an enormous amount of stress and sadness. With these emotions also comes the fear of the unknown; an unparalleled point in life when we repeatedly ask ourselves where we will go from here. During such a tumultuous time, it is important to recognize the positives in our life and use this as an opportunity to strengthen the relationships that remain.
At such a difficult time, it is hard to be optimistic about our present, nonetheless about the future. However, we must force ourselves to look upon this as an opportunity in life, rather than a closed door. This is a time when we can take control in our lives and plan the direction we want to go. It seems common for us to have given-up a dream or desire in life and this is the time to regain what we sacrificed. We cannot be pulled down by a divorce. We must consider it a place to be reborn; our own personal renaissance.
For those who have children, this can compound the stress of the situation and add an immense amount of guilt. Again, though, we must “count our blessings” and help our children do the same. It is integral that we do not insult our spouse, nor can we allow ourselves to exclude them from processing the divorce with our children. As within our own lives, a divorce can present children an opportunity for personal growth.
This is also a chance for us to strengthen our current relationships, rekindle those of our past and build new ones. In addition, we can also involve our children in these socializing efforts. There are innumerable benefits to exercising our kinships and friendships, especially during trying times. The experiences and advice of others can be invaluable for both parents and children.
In addition to calling on the strength of our loved ones to help ourselves and our children through a divorce, the expertise of those holding and participating in support groups can be a wonderful resource. Associating with these individuals provides us, not just with support, but also with knowledge and insight. These groups can also serve as the starting point for life-long friendships built upon a common bond.
In the trying times of divorce, we do have to accept the loss of our marriage; a relationship that is, no doubt, one of the most significant in an individual’s life. However, we must focus our attention on our children and the other relationships that are important to us. We must utilize this as an opportunity to see things from an optimistic perspective and start anew, cherishing those people who still exist in our lives and constructing fresh relationships to take on this journey with us.
Losing a loved one is perhaps the hardest thing that anyone who is in love can experience; the loss not only leaves a giant hole in your life, but it affects your goals, your plans, and your direction for the future too. Well-meaning friends and family members may try to offer words of wisdom, or simply try to encourage you to start dating again by setting you up on blind dates. It is important, however, to listen to your own instincts and allow yourself to move on only when you are well and ready to do so.
Allowing Yourself To Grieve
By giving yourself the permission needed to cry, scream, feel anger and rage, you are allowing yourself to embrace the very natural feelings that accompany the loss of a loved one. If you do not accept that you will feel this way then you are very likely to either never find your way out of the black hole that grief has placed you into, or you are likely to see the grief manifest itself in other negative ways. Certainly, if you have small children, you must stand strong for them – but if you do not show them that it is okay to feel sad and that it is okay to cry then you are likely leading them down the path of potential behavior problems in the future.
The Passage Of Time
The cliché of “time heals all wounds” must not have been taking the loss of a loved one into consideration. No matter how much time has elapsed, chances are that you are always going to see, hear, and feel subtle reminders of your late partner. One of the primary key points to help yourself accept and manage these reminders is to try to focus on the warm memories that they bring with them; by focusing more on the happy memories and less on the feelings of loss, you may find that those subtle reminders bring a smile to your face instead of tears in your eyes and a pain in your heart.
There is no set time when it comes to the length of time that will be needed for you to feel that you are ready to step into the possibility of a new relationship. This is something that only you can decide.
- Do you feel ready to open your heart to a potential new love?
- Does your grief allow you the possibility of potentially sharing your bed with someone new?
It is vital that you, and only you, take the time needed to evaluate your life now and how it will be impacted by your decision to foray into the dating world again. If you have small children it may be necessary to place your focus, instead, on them and their abilities to cope with the loss in your family. Older children who have moved out of the home and have lives of their own should not be a deciding factor in your decision to start dating again – your decision to do so does not directly impact their day-to-day lives.